A Reinvention and My Future on Substack

In which I discuss some thoughts I've been having about my writing here and what I plan to do going forward

Well, hello there. You probably thought I was dead.

The truth is, I’ve been extremely busy, being the mother of a toddler, moving to and setting up a homestead, building relationships with friends and family in the real world (I know, right?). But there’s more, too—something I’ve been thinking about for a long time, and that is: What am I doing here?

See, I never set out to be a politico. This Substack was born out of rage—rage at the COVID regime, rage at the vast, faceless machine we call Modernity, rage at my own sense of beauty and creativity lost. I never intended to become a writer of “right wing think pieces,” or whatever it is I’ve done here. It just happened, and it just happened that a lot of other people were doing the same thing, and doing it much more thoroughly and frequently than I had time for, which meant I was just repeating points mostly already made, and my heart wasn’t in it.

During the COVID years (or, as they may also be referred to: the Pit of Despair), I found myself grappling with the worth of what I was really passionate about—storytelling. Literature. The kinds of stories that reflect humanity and lay down the bedrock of culture. I thought, Well, what’s the point in discussing such frivolities if the world is just going to crumble into a dystopian hellscape anyway? So I stopped talking about it, which, it turns out, was a major victory for the forces of destruction seeking to wipe the last remaining bits of romance and beauty from the face of the earth.

Years ago, I read a post-apocalyptic novel about a traveling symphony whose motto was, “Survival is insufficient.” And that phrase has stuck with me. If there isn’t more to human existence than basic survival, is it really humanity? Even in the bleakest of times—and maybe especially in the bleakest of times—human beings have felt a deeper sense of purpose in life; that perhaps we’re here not just to make food, build shelter, and huddle together for safety until a predator snags us or we succumb to the elements—that perhaps we’re here to make things a bit more beautiful than we found them. Perhaps we have some intrinsic value to add to this world, and it’s our duty to do so.

Robin Williams’ character puts it well in The Dead Poet’s Society when he says, “We don’t read and write poetry because it’s cute. We read and write poetry because we are members of the human race. And the human race is filled with passion. And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.”

So, what is my future on Substack? Well, I plan to get back to my first love: literature. I want to discuss stories—what makes them great, why the resonate, what our stories say about us. I want to rant about the ugly decline of modern fiction, but I also want to elevate more beauty, discuss how great stories inspire and call out the best in humanity, and explore what deep, raw truths are hidden in their pages—maybe even write a bit of fiction myself. Who knows?

I’m not entirely sure where this venture will go, but it’s something I’ve pondered for many months now, and if it’s not your cup of tea, I get it, no hard feelings. But if it is something you’re interested in, you can hop on over to my new publication Green Tea and Post-It Notes and subscribe, as that’s where I will be writing going forward.

To all of you who have stuck around on this random and sporadic journey, a heartfelt thanks, and I hope to see you on the other side!

In the meantime, further up and further in!